i remember when i updated my blog...

To Whom it May Concern,

I'm kind of surprised that you, whoever you are, are still reading this blog. Because Lord knows that I'm not very good at posting on it apparently.

As for my updates, lots of work. Lots and lots of work. I have now (somewhat) successfully written the first draft of my first 20 page paper in Arabic. While the language used is probably more appropriate for the medium of crayon on construction paper than typed and printed, it has been completed. I am proud.

In celebration of this (well, not really, but I'm celebrating it), all of us (i.e. the 9 people I see all the time) are heading to Madaba this weekend for a night of R&R. To a surprisingly nice hotel. So yeah, Holy Land round 2.

Other updates that I thought people should know: what Arabic television is like.

1) Ton of Cash. This is my favorite gameshow idea ever. In order to win a "ton of cash" the two teams of contestants literally just carry a ton of cash around obstacle courses in the same remote desert beach locale each episode. They don't really ever do anything new. Just move the money from place A to place B, then kick someone off. It kind of reminds me of the Phantom Tollbooth with the Demon of Trivial Tasks, who assigns them to move piles of sand with tweezers 5 feet away, then back. This show is pretty much the same thing. Which is an amazing punishment for people who want to be on reality television. Note: this show is really boring to actually watch.

2) Public Service Announcements: Abu Dhabi television has launched a new PSA campaign that air all the time. They all tend to show a group of 20-something, laughing Arab women gathered in a house around a copious amount of tea, pastries, sweets, etc. Then the maid walks in and starts laughing with them. They all stop laughing, glare at her, and she returns to the kitchen, where she begins to cry while scrubbing the floor. The voiceover then reads an ayat from the Qur'an to us about how all life should be respected, then the campaign's slogan comes on: "Maids are people too." After recent accusations of Abu Dhabi citizens virtually enslaving their Filipino or Indonesian maids, this is probably a good idea. It's still a very weird commercial message to encounter. Especially because it looks like an ad for a soap opera.

lesson learned

Previous comments on rain, all sad little statements. I was trapped on campus yesterday because the university flooded in the deluge. I tried to forge my way to the library, was blocked by a river of water about 6 inches deep, then was trapped in a crowd of people trying to get to the university administration, which, for whatever reason, has a somewhat sunken foundation, so there was about two feet of water between them and the door. Benches had been dragged in and people one by one were walking across. Defeated, I returned to the Language Center and skyped Megan. When it was perfectly sunny an hour later, I sloshed through the mud now coating everything, and tried to find the books I wanted in the library for my term paper. There was one. In the French translation. So somewhat of a waste.

I think I'm utterly unprepared for winter in this country.

and i want to know...

It rained yesterday in Amman (get the reference? anyone? maybe? I don't get to make jokes to often these days because they're in Arabic and even I fail to understand them). Which is the 3rd time I have seen rain in the last 6 months (once before here, although that was a very light drizzle at best, and once in Denver between Morocco and Jordan). Yesterday it was actually cold and wet though. As in, the rain had substance to it. It was a very off-putting experience, and forced me to realize that I am probably totally unprepared for winter in this country (there was no thought in my mind of even considering to pack an umbrella). Well, we'll see where this goes for my next two months...

And a clarification of the previous photos:

The Roman Show is this bizarre tourist experience in Jerash (one of the largest sites of a Roman city in the Middle East) that is mostly staffed by retired police officers. Basically, they all dress up in the AUTHENTIC ROMAN COSTUMES as seen in the photos and "re-create" gladiator battles and chariot races for us, the spectators (please don't think I paid for this. It was one of our many voluntary-obligatory experiences in Jordan. Though this one was totally worth the free I paid for it in its oddness). So, anyhow, the entire time we get a commentary by the one ROMAN who spoke some English (although he had that interesting speech condition kind of like a lisp but where all Rs become Ws. Like the bishop in the Princess Bride. Is there a word for this?), mostly about how fierce his legion was in this, the time of Hadrian, while the others ran around responding to commands in Latin. Then the slaves were dragged in to do gladiator battles, which the officers, who otherwise seemed rather bored, got really excited for, as they could pretend to hit each other with tridents and throw nets over each other before the announcer asked us if we preferred life or death. Our audience was in generally fairly not Roman, at least by my standards, and tended to prefer life, but I think he was obligated to show us what death looked like, so he began to ignore our verdicts and kill the gladiators anyhow. Finally, we got our AUTHENTIC ROMAN CHARIOT RACE, which consisted of about three laps while the soundtrack from the movie Gladiator played. I kid you not. After the show ended, we were encouraged to go down and take pictures with the Romans. There are certain things I never expected to do in the Middle East. Then I do them.

more photos (i.e. dead sea and THE ROMAN SHOW)

This time, I'll actually post photos with that cryptic remark:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2102841&l=6284b&id=1013451

more photos (i.e. dead sea and THE ROMAN SHOW)

mmm.... america flavored

Let me just begin this by saying I'm sorry if I broke my own blog. I may have done just that no more than a second ago. I was trying to log in, and because I am tired forgot that the buttons all flip from right-left and versa vice when the computer is set in Arabic (as the university's computers are wont to do). Therefore, in aiming for the log-in button, I accidentally flagged my blog as being inappropriate (which is oddly something that I can read perfectly well in Arabic). So, when the censors take this down, I did this to myself (literally. Not in the "I opposed the 1984 Party" sort of way, or the "I wrote inappropriate things" sort of way. The "I flagged my own blog as being inappropriate because I didn't bother to be literate" sort of way).

Anyhow, a few thoughts from the last few weeks that didn't make it into my sister-is-visiting-themed blog entry.

1) Thanks to Krys (okay, maybe still sister-themed), I made pistachio instant pudding for my family. Which, do to the failure of the word "custard" to be universally understood was explained to them as "warm, but not hot, but not cold... cool! cool ice cream!" However, seeing as the box said Jello on it, their understanding was something like, "Alexander is speaking nonsense, but is clearly making pistachio-flavored Jello for us with milk..." Needless to say, their reactions to the final product were somewhat mixed, (i.e. "At first I thought it was gross, but now it's not so bad. No, I'm fine without seconds."). However, the entire experience reminded me of an amazing part of the US. Pudding is instant! INSTANT! I poured powder into milk and it INSTANTLY began to set and within MERE SECONDS we had full-fledged, firm pudding. How cool is that? Actually, I think it's kind of gross, but that's beside the point. The point is that this is what US science spends time on: making kind of weird foods faster. And as much as I am repulsed by this notion (go slow food! go! but don't hurry!), for some weird reason, it made me very happy to see the instant-ness of pudding, as it is something that only we as Americans would value this much.

2) The Qur'anic lesson books gets better and better. I have learned what springs of Heaven the Righteous Believers drink from (The Spring of Ambrosia of course!), I have learned the word "ambrosia" in Arabic, I have learned which forms of oaths and swearing are blasphemous (anything that doesn't acknowledge God as the source of it's action, including phrases like, "If not for the pudding, I wouldn't have noticed the obsession with instant-ness in the US." Correctly: "If not for God, then the pudding, I wouldn't have noticed the obsession with instant-ness in the US."), I have learned why the evil eye amulet is stupid and no one should wear them (amulets don't protect you from disease), and finally, I have learned the different types of heresy, and their punishments... through grammar exercises ("The great heretic sinned against God and therefore was expelled from the Circle of Islam. The great heretics sinned against God and therefore were expelled from the Circle of Islam. The great female heretic sinned against God and therefore was expelled from the Circle of Islam... etc.).

vacation from what is (somewhat) a vacation

Who's sister is in Jordan? My sister is in Jordan. My real sister. The one I can speak English with. In other words, this was a good weekend. Krys, two of her friends and I spent Saturday at the Dead Sea, renting out access to one of the elite spa resorts there for the day (totally busted my wallet, and totally worth it). The Movenpick of Switzerland (is that seriously a word in German? because it sounds ridiculous) is the luxury hotel chain of Jordan, specializing in recreating small imitations of Paradise in earthy realms (except with little signs that say things like, "Blackberry: a touch of Switzerland" or "Wine: Swiss perfection," so if I pictured heaven with ads for the Swiss tourism board, it'd be pretty close). Anyhow, we checked into their elite spa (complete with a million weirdly named pools that were in theory different if I had understood what they were, i.e. the hydrium, or the kneipp foot pool, or the caldarium, or the thermorium, etc.). That said, many of them sprayed you with jets of water while people handed you new towels (during the course of the day there, I must have received at least 20 towels). The entire thing also overlooks the pristinely blue (on this clear day) Dead Sea, and the rose-colored mountains of Israel. So, after we wearied of the hydrium in the morning, we headed down to the Dead Sea, by gondola (yeah, no stairs. You had to take the gondola to the shore). The Dead Sea itself was quite the experience. It is indeed disgustingly salty (as Krys can attest to, it will burn out your eyes if any water enters them, and the taste is far beyond the gross-out factor of the ocean. Imagine sticking your tongue into every jar in a high school chemistry lab and swishing.). That said, it is also weirdly buoyant. I had been expecting the Dead Sea to be sort of like my experience in the Holy Land. "Cool, I saw that. It was kind of dumb in person, but I did it." Totally wrong. The Dead Sea is amazing! You float! Now, I know that's kind of obvious, but once we were in the water, we realized what floating actually entails. You can just sit in the water, bobbing on the surface, while touching your hands to your toes. Or flip onto your back, grab your ankles with your arms, and do a back bend. On the water. Not sinking. We lay on our stomachs, arms, legs and head in the air, and did not die in the water. So buoyant in fact that if you try to sink (e.g. stand upright in the water and do nothing), you can slowly feel your legs slip out from under you as you rise back up to the surface, winding up on your back or stomach. Swimming as we all know it is actually somewhat impossible in the Dead Sea. You're not far enough into the water for most strokes to work. Rather, it's more like laying down on a kickboard, then propelling yourself in the direction you want to go. So, we bobbed over to the next exclusive resort, took some of their legendary Dead Sea mud, covered our entire bodies (arms, legs, torso, back, face, hair. Everything.), sat out, let the mud dry and do whatever it is it's supposed to (which mostly seemed to be the hilarity factor of what people look like covered head to toe in black mud. Apparently I resemble Gollum in this state), then washed off by floating back to our spa, for more relaxing multi-Roman-derived pools, then finally ending with glasses of Holy Land wine (which tastes a lot like Communion wine, begging the question, does Communion wine actually come from the Holy Land, or does transubstantiation just make it seem that way?) in the Infinity pool overlooking the sea at sunset with he cool jazz-stylings of Bruno in the background. It turns out that Bruno was a little old man wearing a panama hat wielding a laptop, but he still had impeccable jazz-stylings. Or maybe the setting just helped.

Then, yesterday, we did the tourist sites of Amman (a.k.a. old Roman things, cheap Backgammon-filled cafes, and falafel joints frequented by Jordanian royalty), before ending at the Amman modern art museum (Darat al-Funun, the House of the Arts) for an opening at (yet another sunset). The best part of the Darat al-Funun is by far the location. Set on a hill just outside of downtown, it consists of three restored houses (where T.E. Lawrence is said to have written the Seven Pillars of Wisdom) in a lush garden with fountains, and the ruins of a Byzantine church. New favorite locale in Amman.

All in all, not a bad weekend (although very little work was done. Obviously). Hopefully, pictures forthcoming.